Rule 592

Will computers ever replace interpreters?

Nah, computers are way too smart to put up with all crap interpreters take for as little as we get paid.

Rule 588

Scheduled for hours of ASL to English interpreting first thing in the morning and no hearing people show up? That, my friends, is the reason coffee was invented.

Shout out to John Stuckless

Random Thoughts From Uncle Dale: This (Almost) Never Happens To Me, NAD Version

I have to add the qualifier, because it happened.

I walked into the lobby of the hotel and saw the interpreter waiting near the front desk. I walked up and said hi.

She asked, “Are you Dale?”

I said I was.

She said, “you are scheduled to work with me from 2 till 5.”

That was news to me. But let’s admit it, it’s not the first time I have been co-opted into interpreting by just putting me on the schedule.

I looked at Aunt SuperTam as if to say, “don’t blame me I didn’t volunteer!”

The Interpreter caught the look and pulled out the schedule to show me and from 2-5 the schedule read her and Dale ‘Not Me.’

That is the first time in my life I have ever been asked, “are you Dale?” and NOT been the Dale in question.

If your name is John or Stephanie or Chris I imagine such things happen all the time. But I can count the number of Dale’s I know or have met on one hand.

Now it was not only NOT JUST NOT ME but another interpreter. A smaller world inside the bigger one.

By the way, Dale ‘Not Me’ showed up. He is a very nice guy with Mad Skills. I’d be willing to be mistaken for him anytime.

Anyway I can’t say “That never happens” to me anymore, because it did.

I’m pretty sure Aunt SuperTam will never experience that because we are still looking for a can of Coke with the name ‘Tammis’. Pretty sure we won’t find one.

Rule 583

CART, publicly displaying my ASL-to-Spoken English skills, the good, the bad and the ugly, since March 23, 1982.

Thank you Chip Royce

Rule 579

Dear Team,

Just a few things I would ask you to consider doing at home instead of in front of me while I work (each of these are true):

Flossing;

Clipping your toenails;

Arguing with your Ex on the phone (vocally, VRS or text);

Chewing tobacco and spitting in a cup;

Texting memes to the client;

Sexting;

Sleeping;

Vaping;

Watching YouTube Videos; or,

Taking your bra off without removing your shirt (I KID YOU NOT). It’s impressive, I agree, but you are not invisible just because your back is to the audience (That does not mean take your shirt off first and then… look, you’re kind of missing the point, just don’t).

Thank you.

This list is not exhaustive. I am sure that I will add to it.

Rule 576

This is funny, but now is not the time to laugh;

This is sad, but now is not the time to cry;

You’re interpreting. This is the time for your client to laugh or cry.

Rule 573

The Americans with Disabilities Act is not a law. It is five laws (two of which you will likely NEVER use) that are kept in one three-ring-binder.

Never presume that understanding Title I gives you any insight into Title II or knowing the first two means you get Title III.

Section 501 (raise your hand if you knew that was a thing!), Section 504 and IDE(E)A are in separate binders, but heavily cross-referenced.