Interpreting: where you can legitimately say, “they do not pay me enough to do this,” and, “I can’t believe they pay me to do this!” on the very same day!
Tag: ouch
Rule 749
Interpreters. Like a mime, but usually less irritating. Usually.
Rule 739
If you ever want to know how much embarrassment you can take, interpret for a mediocre comedian who needs an easy target to save his act.
Rule 738
Wash your hands if you touch anything at a hospital, including any part of the sink where you just washed your hands.
Rule 736
“We don’t have a budget for Interpreters,” is not a defense.
The proper response is, “well nothing is in the budget until you put it there. This oversight will make finding the money for Interpreters difficult, but you’ll figure it out.
On the bright side, now you will know how much to budget for Interpreters in the future so you’ll never have to worry about it again.”
Rule 728
We have to accept that we can try and try to help someone make their life better, but we can never overcome that person’s compulsion to make their life worse.
Rule 726
VRI Interpreters! If you can put on pants and maybe, I don’t know, shower-even when you don’t need to (because seriously! Who would ever know)-then maybe VRI is for you!
Like a Drone pilot, VRI Interpreters sit in a room with the power over life and death hundreds or even thousands of miles away (but unlike a Drone pilot “life” is really what you are going for).
VRI! Sure VRI is a two dimensional presentation of a three dimensional language, but let’s not get bougie and start demanding ALL the dimensions. Ok?
Rule 723
Interpreters! Enjoy the liberation that comes only from being your own boss! You can choose to work any 22 hours out of the day you want!
Yes! You have the freedom to choose the 154 hours you will work each week. No one can tell you which 154-that is for you to decide! It’s all up to you! That’s independence!
Rule 718
Remember Platform Interpreters:
It is always darkest before you accidentally step off the edge of the stage and break your tailbone.
Rule 717
Never mistake the time an appointment starts for “on time.”
