Rule 729

The client will be late? Need to pass the time? Ask if they have a lost and found, then just start describing random things and see if you are psychic.

Jackpot!

Rule 726

VRI Interpreters! If you can put on pants and maybe, I don’t know, shower-even when you don’t need to (because seriously! Who would ever know)-then maybe VRI is for you!

Like a Drone pilot, VRI Interpreters sit in a room with the power over life and death hundreds or even thousands of miles away (but unlike a Drone pilot “life” is really what you are going for).

VRI! Sure VRI is a two dimensional presentation of a three dimensional language, but let’s not get bougie and start demanding ALL the dimensions. Ok?

Rule 724

VRS Interpreters! Enjoy the tomb-like security that only a cubicle can bring. Yes, for the simple price of a regular paycheck (and lack of exposure to any natural light) you too can spend your days on hold with the Social Security Administration and your nights making bootie calls, all from the claustrophobic comfort of your cubicle. Hazzah!

Rule 722

You say the fourth grader you interpret for is ignoring you?

Look around.

How many of these kids are hanging on every word the teacher says?

Congratulations!

You are interpreting for a very normal elementary school kid.

Rule 716

Freelance considerations:

Good tires

Layers

Traffic/Time between appointments

Snacks

VRI considerations:

Internet connection

Lighting

Background

Snacks

Pants (yes/no)

VRS Considerations:

Context

Hold music vs. sanity

Snacks

Pants (Why, and would anyone in the Call Center notice/care)

Rule 715

Things Interpreters may think, but probably should not say (an on-going series):

You are really testing my people skills.